October 14, 2009
we spent some time, on this rainy day, at huntington beach. the rain paused briefly to let isaak "get his energy out!" we had the moist sand all to ourselves. perfect for making tracks. we observed waves. isaak discovered "pledge allegiance to the flag!" we walked. we laughed. we ran. and then the drizzle began. isaak had been longing to use his umbrella. so, up the shelter came. at this point, i felt myself getting crabby. isaak was so thrilled to be playing in the drizzle. he had been eagerly awaiting the fun. i don't quite know what came over me... but i was just not feeling it. my inner grouch came out. i heard myself saying things to my sweet boy that i didn't like. yet, i kept up the bad mood. i felt a battle rage inside me. knowing i was not liking my mama-ing. i chose to stop. take a breath. and confess. and heard my precious boy say "it's okay mama... i forgive." today, i am grateful for the pure heart of my son. for the lesson of how to forgive. without hesitation. without strings. only love.